Is it to be sure you get everything you want in life? Is it to make sure no one takes advantage of you? Is it to be “fierce”? Is it to make sure your spouse knows that he/she can’t tell you what to do? Is it to make sure that you are in control? Is it to make sure that you are not taken for… Read More »What is Your Prime Directive?
I just want to ask a question and I want an honest answer: Is there anyone who is ever happy on Valentine’s Day? If so, they are statistically insignificant. So there. Whether you are single and wish you weren’t, or married and wish you weren’t, or dating and confused about what to do for Valentine’s, we are all in a mess. It’s like we’ve all… Read More »It’s Valentine’s Day – Gag Me with a Heart-Shaped Chocolate Spoon
And even then, it’s probably not MY problem! There is a lot of pressure for us to justify our existence by solving problems. And there’s something to be said for solving problems. At the same time, sometimes things are just what they are. There is no real action item. You can just look at it and move on. You don’t have to do anything about… Read More »It’s Only a Problem if I Say it’s a Problem!
Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. For many people this is very stressful. Perhaps your sweetie was upset with you for whatever you did or did not do at Christmas. This feels like your last opportunity to make up for a year’s worth (or more!) of mad. Anyway, somehow your evaluation for how your marriage is doing is going to occur on Valentine’s Day,… Read More »How to Survive Valentine’s Day Without Getting a Divorce
There are no words to express the abyss between isolation and having one ally. It may be conceded to the mathematician that four is twice two. But two is not twice one; two is two thousand times one. – G. K. Chesterton I love that quote. And I am sharing it with you to let you know that I really do know how important it… Read More »There Are No Words
Everybody has deal-breakers, AKA non-negotiables. You have them and your partner has them. Non-negotiables are extremely personal, and if you like, quirky. If you want to have a happy life and relationship, do not give in to the temptation to test your partner’s love for you by creating a situation in which (s)he must choose between the non-negotiable and you. For example, if your spouse… Read More »Deal-breakers and Relationship Commitment
Just about every couple could benefit from seeing a marriage counselor at some point in their marriage. Timing is an important consideration. Don’t wait until your marriage is almost dead before you see a marriage counselor! Make an appointment when you “hit a snag”. What I mean by that is that when you and your partner have an issue that isn’t resolving and is in fact… Read More »How Do You Know When it’s Time to Go to a Marriage Counselor?
Dishwashers don’t really do the dishes for you, as everyone imagines. If you have a dishwasher, you have to load it – and everyone in the family seems to have a different idea of the correct way of doing that – and unload it – and everyone in the family plays musical chairs with that job! For some reason, unloading the dishwasher is a universally… Read More »A Peaceful House – Keeping Up With the Dishes
Personal boundaries are necessary. If you feel that people “walk all over you”, or if you wonder if you are a “doormat”, think about your own boundaries. First consider what they are. You may not know! And then think about this: Once you know what your boundaries are, if you do not let other people know, you are not being honest with them. You may… Read More »Do You Have Trouble Saying No?
Most of us think marriage counseling is “hard” and Pre-K is “easy”. But, really, you should have no more anxiety about going to a marriage counselor than you would about going to Pre-K! Bear with me as I share my latest (tongue in cheek) thoughts with you… In marriage counseling, you learn to share. You learn about others. You learn how to take turns. You… Read More »Marriage Counseling Can Be as “Easy” as Pre-K!