Wrong Belief #1: I can control my spouse’s behavior, thoughts, and speech. When we see this sentence written out, we may think we don’t believe “that”. But let me ask you this: do you get angry when people don’t agree with you? Do you take it as a personal affront? Do you see it as your mission to “educate” someone who is “incorrect”? Do you… Read More »Wrong Belief #1: I Can Control My Spouse
Spring – a time when life begins anew. After this past winter, I am hungry for spring. One way I prepare is to take stock, and to clean up what is staying and say goodbye to what it’s time to get rid of. We can do this with our relationships too. Don’t worry – I will not advise you to get rid of anybody! (Dumping… Read More »Spring Clean Your Relationships!
When I decide to listen, I like to begin by using my sense of hearing to tune in to my environment. I just make note of the sounds of my house, like my dog snoring, or the noise the washing machine makes. I notice if a sound is pleasant or unpleasant. If it’s unpleasant, is there anything I can do to change it? I can… Read More »What will you hear if you listen?
What are your New Year’s resolutions? Get your finances in order? Get your house in order? Lose weight? Start exercising? Join a gym? Get your closet and wardrobe in order? Fix your marriage or else? Please throw these resolutions out the window! This year, I want you to consider a different kind of resolution: resolve to listen to your body and reclaim your health slowly… Read More »A new take on New Year Resolutions
How to be cheerful Cheerful is such an old-fashioned word. We hardly ever hear (or say) it anymore. (We reserve the word “cheerful” for Santa Claus.) To be cheerful means to be full of good spirits, to communicate good to those around you. However, watching the news, rushing around, and just living in our modern world can take its toll. We must consciously decide to… Read More »How and why you should be cheerful
It’s the little things sometimes that make or break us. Here are some ideas for making going back-to-school easier: Lock up all electronic devices one hour before your kids’ bedtime. Turn off the TV. Stop looking at any lighted screen. Get ready for bed and wind down. This goes for everybody in the house! You need your rest! Do not let your children sign up… Read More »5 Back-to-School Life Hacks
We are all experiencing massive and fast moving changes these days, so I thought it would be a good idea to revisit the idea of boundaries. Boundaries help us to know where I end and you begin. They help us to know who is responsible for doing what. You may feel conflicted about boundaries – after all, boundaries are there in part to keep other… Read More »My Take on Boundaries
Do you ever wonder why demanding doesn’t work? There are reasons your demands are being met with resistance. When people get demanding, it may be because they are alarmed and are thinking of something as an emergency or survival situation. The demander doesn’t know what to do and thinks the demandee does. It is like a child screaming to its mother. When this happens, the… Read More »How to Deal with Demanding People
Sometimes people tell me how much they long for and need “closure.” In my experience, closure is a construct that doesn’t really exist. Wouldn’t it be lovely to feel that a negative situation or experience has perfectly resolved, and can be tied up with a bow and filed in the basement? Wouldn’t it be lovely to feel completely “free” of any bad memories or difficult… Read More »Thoughts on Closure
This simple advice works whether you want to get healthy, get your house under control, change your style, go from a disappointing marriage to a happy marriage, let go of past hurts and find joy in the future, and the list goes on. (Please don’t bring up Afghanistan or Nazi Germany. We are talking about YOU and your life, not the worst problems in history.)… Read More »Where You Are Now to Where You Want to Be is Only 2 Steps Away