If you’re fighting over a messy house and you are considering getting relationship counseling to deal with it, please know you are allowed to hire a housekeeper!
If you are married and both of you work, or if you are busy and have children, please know that you are allowed to hire a housekeeper.
(Actually, anyone is allowed to hire a housekeeper!) You don’t have to do it all.
It used to be more common to hire help, but I have talked to many clients who feel guilty for not doing all the housework themselves. And then sometimes they get angry at their spouses because they are not “doing their part”.
I think we live in an age in which we must all be superheroes, and do the impossible daily, or we are not “contributing”. I would like for all of us to think about what having a pleasant life would be like. Just think about that word– “pleasant”. Do we even say that anymore? “What a pleasant evening.” “You are such pleasant company.” Wouldn’t it be pleasant to come home and not be busy one evening? Just to come home to a clean house, and not have to take the children to a soccer game, to come home and have a glass of wine, or lemonade or something, and then to visit over a nice dinner. Maybe listen to music, or watch a movie. How special that would be, to have an evening with nothing to do but to just enjoy your house and each other.
If this sounds like heaven to you, I hereby give you permission to hire a housekeeper! Here are some things you should know first: A housekeeper typically does not reorganize your house. (S)he will just do the cleaning tasks, like vacuuming, dusting, cleaning the bathroom, cleaning the kitchen, and laundry. If you are overrun with clutter, the housekeeper will just work around that as best as (s)he can. So, for those of you who are afraid you will feel guilty for hiring a housekeeper, you will still be doing lots of things in your house. You will be decluttering, reorganizing, putting things away, doing daily dishes, laundry, etc. You are not abdicating – you are hiring an assistant. An assistant that may be just what you need to create your happily ever after—now.