So often we spend our whole day working – checking things off of our to-do list. At the end of the day we evaluate whether we should feel proud because of all we “got done”, or bad because we barely made a dent. In order to accomplish more, more, more we often do things in a hurry, and we go on autopilot. Into this mix we put our relationship problems as well. Need to “spend time” with our significant other, which we make into another task. At the end of the day we may evaluate whether it was worth it or not. Did we have fun? Did we get into an argument? We really need to figure out how we are going to deal with our finances, our children, our sex life, who is going to make dinner, who is going to wash the dishes, etc. etc. You know, sometimes I look back over the arguments I used to have with my husband, and I wonder what we were fighting about! We had enough to eat; we had a nice place to live; we had clothes in the closet.
Just for today, try NOT solving your problems. Instead, enjoy whatever you can.
You may not be able to enjoy spending time with your spouse right now. That’s ok. You may not enjoy your house right now, or your children, or your job, or even your friends. That’s ok. Take time to enjoy whatever you can. Taste your food. Feel the sun (or the rain) on your face. Pet your cat. If you are busy with a task, see if you can enjoy it while you are doing it. Sometimes I like washing dishes! I like putting my hands into the warm, sudsy water. I like seeing things become clean. I recently saw a show about a mother who almost lost her children in a car wreck. She said that now when she hears them argue in the backseat, it is like music to her ears!
There are some problems we are not ever going to “solve”. We may not be meant to. We are all here for a reason, and it’s not to see how many things we can check off our list! Your homework for today is to stop trying to fix whatever is bothering you, and to pay attention to the little things you can enjoy. Your problems will still be there for you tomorrow, but perhaps you will see them in a different light, after you’ve had a nice day, and oh yeah, go to bed at a decent hour, too. That’s your extra credit homework!